Spinning out of control..got rid of my support system..which was tay

Fighitng with every breath in me not to cut
today is harder then most
my head is spinning too I feel rather odd
almost like im not even in my own body
I just turned away the only true friend I have and thats tay.
now im alone again...
did i really do it for the right reasons? Or was it a part of my self-destructive behavior.
Cut i want to cut so badly
...
wait a second

there is the blood lmao..4 days away and i cut again
I'm trying to Praise God in the Storm but its rather difficult
I just want to die..die die
if i can only find my razor blade cuz this needle is not going to do the job.

Lower and Lower I fall...